Does anyone else struggle with low libido? I feel so alone in this. I think that I've had a normal libido throughout my life, but for the last year or so, it's been so low and still is. My partner or our relationship aren't the problem because I don't even get the desire to masturbate often (but I get that more than for sex with my partner). The pill is also not guilty because my libido is like this for longer than I've been on it, and in case it is the pill, my gyno and I tried changing it but it's still the same. I have tried eating healthy, exercise, stretching, minimising stress, sleeping as much as possible, communicating with partner, incorporating more non-sexual physical touch with partner, reading erotic books, spicing up our sex life, and overall living healthier. It's not my age either, honestly it should be up the roof for my age (I'm 17). I'm so sad about this because I have the perfect partner who could do oral on me for hours and please only me for hours and who gets pleasure from seeing me pleasured and he could do this everyday for more than once. He is so passionate about me and I hate to see him sad when he can't please me. He 100% understand though and never pressures me for anything or even mentions sex. The problem is, I WANT to make love to him so bad, I want it often. Not for the orgasms nor pleasure so much, but for the connection and the beautiful experience with him. But my mind and body do not cooperate, I never get turned on. At this point I have been crying over it and making it my main worry in life it had been bothering me so bad. I don't know what to do anymore, I feel so broken. I am planning to check my testosterone, but I have a severe needle phobia so that's going to take a few months or more to get done. Until then, what else can I do? I feel like I need a sex therapist so bad, but I can't afford it right now. I have a therapist, but they don't specialise in sex. I was thinking about mentioning this to them but I'm afraid that talking about a minors sex life will be inappropriate or uncomfortable for them. I also have a psychiatrist, but I think they'd be uncomfortable too. Please someone help!

Having a low libido is completely normal, at any age. Nothing is wrong with you and you're not alone. At this point I think that crying and stressing over it is becoming more of a problem than the sex drive itself! I experience low sex drive too and honestly not worrying about it so much and spending less energy trying to "fix" led me to be happier and more relaxed, ironically putting me in a better mental space to have sex! You're not gonna want sex if you're constantly upset about not wanting it. And even if your sex drive doesn't increase, it's completely fine and nothing to be distressed about. I learned this from a great book called Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel. But also, you're 17. You're so young and you have the rest of your life ahead of you to have sex. I really don't think you can call yourself broken or need therapy for not wanting sex at age 17.

@aurielle Thank you so much for your reply! I'm sorry to hear you're also struggling with low sex drive. Sending virtual hugs🫂. So are you saying I should stop trying to fix it and stop worrying about it altogether? What if that doesn't work, or what if I start having even less sex? As for the book you mentioned, I'm thinking of buying Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski. Have you read it?

Honestly I’ve been going thru the same thing but i was planning to get off the pill to make sure is not the pill. I think talking to your gyno is the best and asking her what else can be done as like checking your hormone. In anyway you are not alone in this and is very common:)

I think you should definitely bring up your feelings to your therapist or psychologist but don’t worry about them thinking it’s weird, that’s what they are there for the uncomfortable conversations along with getting everything checked out with your gyno, if it’s not physical it could be mental and that’s why I think you should share those feelings with your therapists and gyno

@bookgirlie yeah I mean it's at least worth a try! Try to relax and not put so much pressure on yourself. What I mean is that stressing about it is certainly not helping. One of the lessons in that book is that sexuality isn't a rational, logic-based thing. Sex drive thrives on openness and sensuality so it isn't necessarily a "problem" that can be "fixed" by "trying harder." Letting go could really help. And if it doesn't work, you can try something else. Having less sex isn't the end of the world, either. And no I haven't read that book.

@aurielle Alright. I will do my best to get it off my mind then and stop seeing it as a problem, as well stop trying to force myself to get turned on and have sex. I will also buy some books about it. Thank you