tw: therapy, mental health / hi guys i’m not too sure where i can post this but i’ve been having therapy for depression/ low moods & anxiety. i started having counselling at my college but decided to get cbt therapy too. i have had 3 sessions (1 assessment & 2 actual sessions), but i’m not sure how to feel, i think they’re not helping loads. i first found my therapist was a little rude on the first session and very blunt with me. then we planned to fill out a cognitive restructuring booklet which is one you download from their website for self help & only has 2 work sheets in it, which is about writing down your thoughts and how to think of an alternative thought. that’s it and the next two sessions i have will literally be me just filling out sheets and giving her feedback on what i wrote. i feel like i can’t really apply this to my day to day life and obviously can’t sit there just filling out a booklet every time i have low mood. i’m so grateful for being able to have it & for the nhs providing it for free. but i’m scared that it is short term therapy with only 4 sessions (unless they decide to extend it) & i haven’t really felt any better. i don’t know if this is the normal for therapy but i just thought i would be able to talk more & we could do more rather than just me doing worksheets at home that i could have printed out and done. i’m really not sure, if anyone has any advice or kind of experiences / what they did in therapy sessions that would be great. i was on a waiting list for almost 2 months and i was feeling really positive and hopeful but i feel like i’m not really getting any better

so sorry this is so long i needed to get it all out

I’m sorry this hasn’t been a great experience for you. It seems like this therapist might not be a great fit. CBT is a very common model that therapists use, but it’s not the only one out there. I’m a therapist and I always welcome my client’s feedback because I understand that therapy is not a one size fits all. Has your therapist given you a space to express how you’re feeling about her approach? If you feel comfortable, I would suggest bringing it up. Having gone to therapy myself, I’ve had to switch to a different therapist because the first one didn’t work out. It’s okay to shop around if you’re able to. I understand you were on a waiting list for quite some time, but do you think that would also be an option?

I also wanted to add that what you’re feeling is very valid and your deserve to be heard, especially in a space like therapy. If I can help in any way please let me know.

@hanxx heya I completely relate, so I have depression and general anxiety disorder, so my college gave me therapy and they call me on the phone every week, and I also have the NHS one, and I find that there are a lot of awkward silences and I feel so awkward talking on the phone and just repeating my past traumas over and over again. With therapy however you can actually suggest to try different things, maybe say this isn’t effective, can we do something else ? They will gladly oblige and find ways to help you. CBT isn’t effective for everyone, people don’t like writing in diaries and writing something nice someone’s said to me. When I told her it wasn’t effective she changed it straight away and now me and her just talk about some of my thoughts. Don’t be afraid to tell them if something isn’t working !!

@lobos14 completely agree !! But with the NHS u kind of receive a ‘take what u can get’ approach, some get lucky and some don’t :( love ur input tho !!! Really insightful !

@Onthedot oh man! That is a bit more tricky! I agree with your advice. Not everyone responds well to those worksheets or to CBT in general. I’m glad your therapist listened to your input and was willing to make those changes! Therapy is about collaboration and a client should have just as much of a voice (if not more) as the therapist.

@lobos14 thank you so much for your lovely reply, she hasn’t really asked me about how i’m feeling with sheets she’s given me. on my assessment she said that i could chose between this and a social anxiety booklet but i really didn’t have a clue so i chose this, my next appointment isn’t for another 2 weeks she just said to continue doing the thought processing sheets and to give her feedback on the next session. i do agree i think maybe i would be best with another therapist. unfortunately i can’t really afford to go private with it :( but i think maybe i could send her an email just to say i’m not finding it very helpful. thank you so much 🤍

@Onthedot thank you so much, i didn’t know i could even ask for a different model. it’s hard because the college counselling was so nice and i didn’t have to talk about anything i was uncomfortable with. with this nhs one i found the assessment especially really hard to talk about the main causes of my problems & i get confused when she’s asking me why and to explain further and ‘how does it make me feel’ bc honestly i just don’t know lol. college have paused for the moment whilst i see how the nhs one goes but they already gave me extra sessions & i leave in july so i know i won’t be able to speak to her for much longer :( i’m just worried that it’s gonna be a waste and i have to try all over again bc i really want therapy to work. so sorry for the massive rant 😂 but thank you so much for your comment it helps to know we are in a similar situation🤍