give me your thoughts! so my boyfriend went to a strip club tonight after his friends birthday party. I was with my friends while he was there. anyway, they asked what he was up to tonight so I said oh he’s at his friends birthday dinner and then at this strip club etc. they got SO concerned with the fact that I “let” my boyfriend go to a strip club.. they thought it was absolutely wild and I actually felt quite judged by them. I explained, it’s harmless fun I don’t see the problem with him going out with his friends? I honestly couldn’t care less! my three friends really disagreed and treated me like I was ridiculous for “allowing” him to go. quite upset me to be honest

Your friends critiquing you for “letting” your boyfriend go to a strip club (something that obviously has to be discussed in a relationship, but ultimately involves only two parties - you and your boyfriend) is super immature and uncalled for. I’d set a boundary with them and tell them they’re not allowed to comment on your relationship like that.

@flowergirl21 thanks for the reply, I completely agree. I’m going to have to bring this up to them. It’s just so pointless to get upset over what I choose to do in my relationship. doesn’t mean they have to in theirs

It honestly sounds like they lack trust and have insecurity issues within their (past) relationships and are reflecting this upon yours. Not cool. They’re also talking about partners like it’s a possession or child.. ew

@yi_eune right? totally agree. one of the girls who i’m not too close with also said “aren’t you scared he’s going to cheat on you”. sounds like she was projecting a little lol

Agree with @yi_eune

The fact that your friends think you should "let" or "allow" your partner do something, shows a lot of immaturity and insecurity in their relationships (past and present) and it seems like they are trying to push their insecurities on to you!

@teamedward LOL like a stripper would want to have sex with any random boyfriend that comes in

Agree, your friends have an immature mindset when it comes to this. Strip clubs are harmless and I've never seen an issue my SO going to one

@aurielle @martini_2 agree! thank you for giving me reassurance here. i’m honestly reconsidering who i’m around, I feel like they had this toxic / sexist mindset toward strippers as well

Every relationship has its own boundaries WRT strip clubs but your friends shouldn’t think it’s ok to “let” their partners do things nor should they be judging you/your relationship. If you do not like the attitude your friends exert maybe it’s best not to remain friends.

TW: abuse I don’t likes this idea of “letting” partners do things and not do things (except for cheating and abuse obviously). It’s very controlling. I think you’re very mature for this. It’s not their relationship so I wouldn’t pay attention to them.

@tailosailo thank you I needed to hear this!