Hey girls, mine and my boyfriend’s sex life is struggling at the moment. We hardly have sex anymore and I’ve asked my boyfriend why (he’s more of the initiator than me) and he said it’s because I don’t initiate so he’s gotten bored of always initiating and not getting it back. However the last couple times we’ve had sex he stopped halfway through saying that his hair is annoying him or something. Last night we had sex and he finished and normally he will always try to make me finish but he then said I’ll make you finish tomorrow. It made me a bit annoyed because why do I have to wait until tomorrow when he’s finished and he could do it then. He then said it’s because his nails were too long so I gave him the nail cutter and he said no. He then said it’s because he saw a lot of his cum down there so I said I’d wiped it up and he still said no just wait until tomorrow. Then this morning he asked for the nail cutter and I said why couldn’t you cut them last night and he got annoyed because I made that comment and we ended up falling out. Last night we came to the solution that I need to start initiating more so I was on board to do that but then this morning we just had an argument and I don’t really know what to do. Can anyone help me on how to deal with this

I do understand that him being the one that initiates that it does get tiring after a while, he wants to feel desired too. But I find it concerning he didn’t bring it up and instead waited for you to start the conversation? Everything else you mentioned is either really silly or a red flag even. I find it really selfish of him to finish and then throw you to the side. Are you both still happy in this relationship? Is something going on in his personal life? Because it sounds like there might be other things going on.

Both people in the relationship need to put effort into their sex life. It sounds like that hasn't been the case and has become dull or boring/mundane. You both need to improve your communication about sex, and actually work to improve it. Make sex exciting again: try new acts, toys, lingerie, fulfilling each other's fantasies etc. And respect each other's boundaries. If he doesn't want to have sex right now or he doesn't feel comfortable for whatever reason : don't force it and communicate about it instead. Him not making you orgasm is a little selfish of him, but if he has strong boundaries about visible cum, then he needs to speak up and get to a compromise that works for both of you.

@xNymphadora yeah I agree with what you said, he could always make sure that she finishes first if he doesn’t want to be around his own cum. There is definitely ways to handle this better in the future.