Hey guys, is anyone here practicing celibacy? I committed to being celibate on Oct 30th of 2024 but so far I’ve broken it had sex 6 different times since then. I’m very ashamed as i didn’t realize this was going to be so hard for me. I love to have sex but it looks like I don’t love myself enough to resist my urges, it feels like I’m cheating on myself. Without any judgement, does anyone here have advice on how I can commit to celibacy and combat lust? I’ve been 4 weeks sex free so far.

Yes but not intentionally or consciously, it’s just happened so I wouldn’t say I’m actually practicing celibacy I just haven’t found someone I wanted to have sex with or just haven’t ended up having sex with anyone I did fancy. Casual sex isn’t for me anymore for multiple reasons and I haven’t gone further than a second date anyone since I’ve been single. What else are you doing to relieve your “urges”? Clearly you have needs - totally fine - you just need to find a way to satisfy those needs *and* remove the paths that lead you to relieve those needs in a way that you don’t like afterwards. It’s definitely worth looking back at those 6 times you’ve broken that promise to yourself and seeing what led you to taking those actions, is there a pattern?

I think it also depends on what’s driving the decision to be celibate and what you hope to accomplish by it. I always find it easier to stick to goals when I remind myself of the purpose behind them and what I’m ultimately trying to achieve. I’m not sure what your reasoning is but perhaps it makes sense to work on your relationship to sex on a deeper level—what is making you ashamed? Do you think sex is inherently “bad” or are you just wanting a deeper connection before sex? Having sec doesn’t inherently mean you don’t love yourself. I would think about why you’ve decided to be celibate and whether there’s something you need to work on on a deeper level—perhaps even combined w maintaining celibacy. I haven’t had sex in almost a year just bc I haven’t been dating but I still masturbate once in a while—everyone has needs there’s nothing wrong w that!

I have the same question as @Grazydol8 why do you want to be celibate? There's nothing inherently wrong with having sex and enjoying it.