Need advice. My “boyfriend” and I have not been seeing eye to eye, can’t even say recently more like for months. He is an alcoholic so struggles to hold a job. I have caught him texting other girls during the beginning of our relationship and has a very weird friendship with his ex. He has gotten and lost multiple jobs that I helped him get over the past year and a half we have been together. I got him into his low-income apartment, even paid the deposit for it so he could have some stability. He gets a small monthly check outside of being employed. He does not keep his apartment clean, ruined the furniture I bought him, one time bought me all this food and then when I tried to go home, cussed me out and told me I couldn’t bring the food with me etc. There are many of these strange instances. A big issue is the drinking, when he is drunk he is violent sometimes. Most recent incident is we went out for his birthday, and i got side tracked talking to a friend in the bar for like 10 minutes. Bartender comes over to me and says my man is angry and looking for me ( so embarrassing) so I go up there and he’s storming out of the bar throwing my stuff on the ground, i pay and walk home alone. He is at my house when I get there, obviously we argue but he is screaming at the top of his lungs, we both say hurtful things and he hit me twice. I contemplated calling the cops but ultimately did not. Before this, he got a job near my house and the plan was for him to stay with me on the days he worked and walk there. After the incident was his first day so I allowed him back over under the strict boundary that he is not to be drunk or have alcohol in my home. He’s been working for about two weeks now, but is still disrespecting me in my home, and has been drunk the past two nights. The obvious answer is to cut it off. However I feel bad putting his job in jeopardy. The town he lives in is tiny and there are no job opportunities, and the one job opportunity he did have there he blew and got fired from. I feel like I put so much effort into this, i want to see him be the best version of himself but at this point i have no feelings left. He’s 26 and im 22, not that the age difference matters but i just don’t understand why he isn’t taking life seriously enough to stop.

Girl. Is this is a joke? You are acting like this man child’s mother. He seems determined to self destruct, let him. What are you gaining from this? He’s a violent, abusive, dangerous, embarrassing loser. He’s never going to fix himself cos why would he? You swoop in and pay for his things, get him yet another job, he can lie and cheat and hit you and you’ll continue to support him. Cut your losses and stop enabling him. Physical violence only escalates, it doesn’t get better. Get out before it’s too late.

Unfortunately not a joke. You’re absolutely right😩 he’s such a loser. Im honestly starting to feel scared about him being at my house alone when i go to work. I’m bringing him home tomorrow and calling it quits. He’s brought absolutely nothing positive to my life.

@boredgirl19 have a friend around the corner in case he loses his temper. If he has a key change your locks. If he turns up at your place ring the police. Do not take any chances.

Please do not bring him home to end things. He seems unsafe to be around, he's already hit you once. This is abusive and you are absolutely right to end things but do it safely... either in public at a coffee shop or something or over the phone. Do not put your safety at risk by doing it somewhere alone / in an apartment or a car. He's a loser and is not worth one more moment of your time.

I hope you left this guy 😭😭😭❤️ and I hope you’re safe and sound.