TW: Alcoholism
Honestly, I just need to vent.
I broke up with my recovering alcoholic bf recently. He was incredibly rude to me on Monday after I supported him and was willing to support him through his DUI and alcoholism. Despite, making clear I wouldn’t if he did this again, as he’s relapsed many times in our relationship. Honestly, I was questioning whether or not I should even be with him when he told me he relapsed because I don’t want to be someone’s reason to be sober and I truly started to dislike his behaviour. But I felt bad that he would go crazy and drink again. That shouldn’t be on me, though.
He even posted on a DUI subreddit, posting in his favour that I wasn’t willing to support him which was completely untrue. He even lied multiple times throughout our relationship, waiting 4 months to tell me that he was an alcoholic, he lied about his education (he didn’t graduate university), he lied to his family and his friends about his level of alcoholism and other parts of his life, and he truly lied about so many things I’m realizing.
Even in this DUI subreddit he’s lying about what happened. It’s just incredibly frustrating.
But weirdly enough I feel so happy that we’re not together, I feel like there’s this release that I haven’t felt in a long time. After he berated and insulted me on Monday, I realized that I was settling for someone that was terrible. I’m 24 years old, and he’s 10 years older than me. He lives at home and doesn’t have a stable job. I just finished getting my masters and I finished an internship at a consulting firm. I have my whole life ahead of me and I don’t want someone in my life that will bring me down. I want children and I’m so glad that I realized this early on. We were together for only eight months, exclusively. And he put all this pressure on me to be this level of support when that’s incredibly dangerous.
All in all, my mental health and future matters more than his sobriety.