Hi. I didn’t know where to post this and who to talk to where I could get someone to help me understand what just happened to me, or if i’m overreacting?
WARNING: I don’t know if this needs a warning but possible SA?
I’m 20F, and I had been dating this guy for a few months, and he seemed to really want to have a long term relationship with me, which i was hesitant about but open to the idea of. Eventually, he started to call me his girlfriend, but I don’t think he ever fully asked me.
We went on a date recently this past weekend, and we went basically to an arcade place, and it was fun. I enjoyed myself. I felt comfortable enough at this point to go back to his house because he wanted to have a movie night with me. Like I said we’ve been talking and dating for a few months at this point, I never would’ve felt comfortable doing that if we hadn’t of.
Everything started off fine, and he turned on a movie and fed me and we were just having a good time. Eventually he wanted to give me a back massage as an apology for being late to our date, and I agreed. I was comfortable with that. I was comfortable with oral, but afterwards he wanted to have penetrative sex. I was not comfortable with that, and I told him that ai didn’t think I was ready. I was a virgin, and I really was not ready to lose my virginity yet. I thought he understood because we just laid there for a minute and talked, but he kept persisting and telling me to trust him. I still wasn’t comfortable. Then he said, well let’s just 69, and I said okay. But ultimately he still kept trying to have penetrative sex with me, and we ended up doing it because he kept insisting, but i really wasn’t ready to. After we finish the first time, he was really nice to me and got me food and clothes to wear that were more comfortable, but i didn’t feel right about the way i felt pressured to do it just because of how many dates he said we had been on without having sex. We started watching another movie, but then he wanted to have sex again, but I was sore from the first time, and i told him that but he insisted. I told him that it was hurting me when we started again, but he said it was okay and basically didn’t stop until he finished.
I spent the night because it was already so late, and i don’t think i had fully comprehend what just happened. Then the next morning after we showered and went outside for a bit, he asked did I want to go again. I said i really can’t because i’m sore and had work later that night. He didn’t say anything initially then he asked me again, and i said the same thing. He told me to just give him head then, and i said okay. But he still said he needed to get inside me and told me to lay down. But contrary to the night before, he didn’t prep me at all really, and i told him that it hurt, but he didn’t stop still. I told him I was going home after that and he asked if i was mad at him, and if we could go out again this week, which let me know that he felt like he did something he shouldn’t have. I don’t know if this is considered SA guys, but I really don’t like the way that happened; especially the following morning. He’s been calling me to see if I’m okay repeatedly and i have not felt like talking. I don’t know if i’m overreacting or what. But i was sore all yesterday and had to go to an urgent care clinic because of the pain and discharge and they gave me antibiotics because they said I most likely got BV. I’m just sad and hurt that he put me in that position and didn’t listen to me. Any thoughts please?
