Bit random but i’ve been speaking to this guy on hinge and we have spoken about going on a date on friday. he seems nice i don’t know a lot, but he takes just over a day each time to reply to me. I know we haven’t met and barely know each other so i don’t think badly of him for taking a while to reply (promise i’m not like that) but i more feel a bit weird about meeting him friday when i don’t hear from him much. am i overthinking it?

Me personally I would feel weird if someone was taking a day to text me especially if we are meeting soon.

He could be someone that just doesn’t like texting. It’s a bit inconvenient when making plans, but I don’t think it’s has to too with level of interest necessarily

I don’t think it’s that big of a deal, I check my WhatsApp every couple days at most.

My question would be more do you feel you know him well enough to go on a date. If you're basically sending one text per day, although there's nothing wrong with that, it's not a ton of conversation/information (unless they're long texts)

@aurielle Yeahhh i mean i know him a bit, they aren’t like super short texts (not always long). I think i’m just a bit unsure about meeting when it’s like this bc it usually isn’t but i don’t want to say anything and he does seem nice and i do want to meet him

@tailosailo very true, i think i just am not too sure about it

i’d probably trust your gut if you’re not feeling sure, but is it just nerves or is it a gut feeling?

@onthepillxo i think it’s the fact that he replies once a day at the same kind of time in the evening and then doesn’t until that some time the next day.. but we are planning to go out on friday which is 2 days away? Idk if i was meeting up w someone on hinge i’d be messaging a little more frequently then that..😂

would you be happy with that level of communication if you were in a relationship?

@onthepillxo defo defo not!! but then again, we haven’t met yet or been speaking for long so i wouldn’t expect that level of communication anyway.. it’s bizarre i think if it’s the same up until friday i’ll just say something. i don’t exactly know what bc he’s not doing anything wrong i just think it’s a bit odd

defo! he’s not doing anything wrong no, but it’s just if you would be happy with that if you got in a relationship with him. defo isn’t the case with everyone but before i met my current partner (especially after we had a first date set in place) we spoke quite frequently and this has carried on throughout the relationship x

@onthepillxo yeah, that’s usually what i’ve experienced when i’ve got a date set up with someone. kind of makes it feel more comfortable like you know them a tad better? well i appreciate you chatting w me about this, i think i’m gonna leave it until tomorrow evening and if im still barely hearing from him i’ll just sort of not go.. but it’s a shame bc he looks lovely and i’m intrigued to meet him i just don’t know why he doesn’t at least message back twice a day that’d be a bit more reassuring

100%, you feel more comfortable and more safe, definitely don’t think you should stand him up but you could just send him a quick message saying that although he seems nice/lovely, you are looking for someone who communicates more frequently than he does, and you wish him the best or something along those lines. it’s up to you though if you go or not, do whatever makes you feel comfortable

@onthepillxo yeah totally, you’re right. do you think it would make sense to just message and say although friday sounds fun, i usually message with someone a bit more frequently to feel comfortable and safe.. and that he seems lovely and id like to meet him, but if this is as much as he can give, maybe it’s not right? the thing is i do want to meet him, he’s probs the most attractive guy i’ve come across on hinge in a while and he sounds rlly interesting so i don’t want to shut it down unnecessarily. but equally me saying that might shut it down anyway

@onthepillxo like maybe he’d give me an explanation as to why it takes so long to get back to me and then even that would be a bit more reassuring. i’m rlly not one of those ppl who needs constant messaging, but just a couple messages throughout the day leading up to when we meet would be nice. also i have his insta but he doesn’t have any posts on there (usually i look at their tagged just to make sure they are who they are and seem like a real person hahahah)

i mean it’s completely up to you, he might tell you he never checks his hinge and give you another platform that he checks more frequently, which you could ask anyways. if you’d like you could just ask if there is a social media platform he answers on more regularly or if he just doesn’t go on his phone a lot? that way you know if it’s just because it’s on hinge or if he would be like this if you got in a relationship further down the line, which clearly that communication type isn’t for you, it’s not for me either- i love talking all day everyday to my partner and it’s defo not for everyone- a lot of people think it’s odd and like their time apart but it’s just how we are. and although i don’t think “cyber stalking” is the way to go, you could probably find his facebook from his instagram name just to double check he is a real person?

@onthepillxo that’s a good idea, i mean it can’t hurt to ask? And realistically if it stays like this i think i’ll feel too nervous to meet with him tbh. i think asking if he has a social he checks more frequently is a good idea thank you!! I think that’s rlly sweet of you and your partner honestly :)) I think i like a bit of time apart but always check ins and not replying a day at a time lol. i think i’m gonna say something bc it can’t hurt, would it be okay if i draft it and get ur opinion? rlly trying not to come across as crazy bc again, v aware i’ve not even met the boy or been speaking to him for longer than a week or two

@onthepillxo Sorry totally latching on to you here, rlly appreciate your advice as i’m not rlly in the mood to confide in my friends about this one as it’s so small and not a big issue haha. here’s my draft: Can I ask, do you have another platform you’re more active on? It’s okay if not, I tend to communicate with someone a bit more frequently if we are planning to meet up.. just how I prefer to do it for comfortability reasons :) - does this sound reasonable?

yeah sounds good- let me know how it goes

@onthepillxo thank you, you’ll be the first to know !!

@onthepillxo Update.. haven’t heard from him hahahah. thinking friday isn’t gonna happen😂 better to know now!

yeah probably not but sounds like your communication types weren’t gonna align anyways x

@onthepillxo Agreed❤️