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Feb 1 23
07:45
Do you guys think my therapist is unprofessional and just sucks at her job? So I’ve been seeing this therapist for probably a year I see her once a month every month and recently I started just doing zoom calls with her instead of going to her office as the drive as far. at first, it was cool, the whole basic get to know you, but she hasn’t done any other progress than that. She asks me the same stupid sh17 every session! There is no support there is no suggestions basically when I think of a therapist, I think of someone who listens and helps you figure out a problem they helping by giving solutions she does not do that. She just asks the same questions every month for an hour not only do I think she sucks at the therapist part she also eats during our session!!!don’t give me wrong there’s nothing with eating your lunch, but when you make your own schedule and your job is listening to people talk about serious problems you think I feel good when you’re shoving food in your mouth? No! Am I crazy? Or is she like horrible at her job? Opinions?
 
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Feb 1 23
08:28
Therapists are not allowed to give or suggest you solutions to your problems, that’s not their job. It sounds like she’s just not the right fit for you, I would suggest looking into trying sessions with a new therapist.
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Feb 1 23
08:57
@bluerose9 I’m sorry what lol? A part of a therapist job is to provide tactics and guidance and advice during emotional times that’s what I mean by solutions to problems
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Feb 1 23
09:11
Yeah, sounds like you may not be compatible with this therapist. It can take some time to find one that fits. Therapists can't exactly tell you "here's what's wrong, go do xyz". It doesn't work that way. They listen and ask questions to help you come to the right conclusions yourself (!) and help you move on from there. They help you process trauma or difficult situations. There are different types of therapy as well. Some help you process trauma by focus more on talking and going through your thoughts. Others such as CBT, focus on changing the way you think and behave to help you manage life's problems.
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Feb 1 23
09:23
^ I mean they are there to help you figure out your life yourself, they’re not there to just give you solutions. It definitely can take a little trial and error to find the right therapist and form of therapy for you so keep looking! I do think it’s a bit unprofessional to be eating lunch when working in such a sensitive job but it just sounds like they are not the right match for you.
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Feb 1 23
13:06
Definitely therapists should work with you to help you figure out problems (without actually telling you what to do) however you have to also play an active role in therapy and guiding how the session goes. I'm sure it's a bit different for every therapeutic relationship, but my therapist would always ask me "what do you want to talk about today?" and it was up to me to decide what topic we were going to discuss in the session or what issue we were going to try to figure out in that session. Are you participating in shaping the sessions that way? Maybe you are I just can't tell from the post. Either way if you feel like you haven't made any progress in a year it definitely sounds like it's time to find a different therapist.
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Feb 1 23
13:38
Definitely shop around!! It usual takes some trial and error to find the right person and it’s super important to have someone you feel comfortable with. But yes also as @aurielle said, make sure you’re actively participating!! You can also ask things like “how do you think I could have handled that situation differently?” Or “do you have any tools or strategies that could help me feel differently about x?”—definitely ask for what you need!!
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