How can I nicely tell my boyfriend he smells musty? I’ve noticed that every time I spend the night at his place there is a musty smell coming from his bathroom and it literally gets on his robes/ clothing too. Sometimes when I sleep in his tshirts I can smell the must/onions from his clothes. It’s not that he doesn’t shower but I just think he has really bad body odor. I also noticed he uses natural deodorants which I warned him can cause you to smell very musty. I also hinted that he should try shaving his armpits but he says men don’t shave their armpits. 🙄 I feel like if he just trimmed those hairs it would remove a lot of that musty bacteria. Sometime when I’m around him I think I’m musty but I’m not. It’s him. I slept there one night in my hair cap and when home to my bed and could smell his odor on my clothes and night cap.

Is just be honest about how you’re feeling about this, you shouldn’t have to soften up for him. The fact that the smell sticks to everything so easily is really worrying to be honest

I think you should straight up tell him, especially if this is the same guy you have told us about before who was disrespectful and said mean comments about your glasses etc. It’s not like he is careful about not hurting/disrespecting you, so you definitely don’t have to tip toe around a legitimate problem you have. However, he shouldn’t have to shave/trim his armpit hair for someone else. A lot of people don’t shave their armpits and still don’t have this problem you are describing. I really don’t think the hair is the problem here. And like @yi_eune said it’s worrying that the smell sticks to everything.

Just say it straight to him and trimming hair won’t get rid of bacteria, just everyday washing under there will

You should stop hinting and warning and start properly communicating.

I think you should be honest with him. Does he have a personal preference to use natural deodorant instead of anti-perspirant? If you don’t want to hurt his feelings you can try to smoothly slip it in the next time you guys hug and say something like “ooooh dang have you been using a new type of deodorant?” mention to him that you think there’s better kinds out there he can be using so he doesn’t smell?

@Yi_eune you’re so right! I should just be straight up. It’s not like he spares my feelings when being honest

@Marmoulak you’re right, I just need to stop being so timid and work on properly communicating how I feel without feeling bad. I think part of this stems from my previous relationship when I use to voice how I feel and get gas lighted for it. But my bf now genuinely wants to know how I feel as long as it’s communicated respectfully.

@sugarNspice so I guess men don’t usually trim their under arms huh?

@GorgeousX I don’t know any man that does

@Sunrisetimex he says he just started using natural. And I use to try to use natural too and it made me musty. And before using it I never smelt like that using aluminum deodorant.

It's not a gender thing. Removing hair doesn't stop body odor for anyone.

On the flip side of things, cup of baking soda to the laundry will take out the smells! Our laundry got super gross due to working out and that worked

Some natural deodorants just don’t work or work for only 1-2 hours so he could try switching out brands

He needs to shower more and change and wash his clothes (and bedsheets) more often, the mustiness comes from a continuous lack of keeping himself and his clothes and room fresh and clean, he definitely also needs to keep his window open more and air out his room. My ex rarely wore deodorant and if he did it was usually natural, but he showered at least once a day and wore items of clothes for max 2 days before washing them, T-shirts usually only one day. Despite being a superrrrr active person he rarely smelt of BO or anything bad (and anytime he did I told him to shower lol). So that’s not necessarily the issue. Definitely say something, I used to live with a guy who’s exactly like you described, he and his room and his clothes always smelt bad and really musty and you could smell his room from a few metres away with the door closed 🥴 so I completely sympathise that sh!t is nottttt pleasant 😭 do not suffer in silence!!!!