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Nov 6
19:18
So my boyfriend really struggles to communicate his feelings to me and it’s beginning to get on my nerves that it’s always me bringing up issues in the relationship and he just yells then says “I don’t understand what I’ve done but I’m sorry” because if we don’t talk stuff through we get moody and bitter and it just gets to where we don’t want to be around each other. This also negatively impacts my sex life, I.e. he’s tired from working 4 x 12 hour shifts a week and I’m stressed with a levels so we don’t really do it anymore and when we do...it’s fast, boring and quite transactional. Help me??
 
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Nov 6
19:21
There’s not much you can do if he isn’t even willing to recognize his own obvious issues with communication and work on them, relationships aren’t one-way streets. Yelling at you when you try to bring up stuff that’s genuinely bothering you is just immature and childish.
 
Nov 6
19:22
He is quite immature in comparison to me, I’m 17 but I’ve always been about 70 realistically inside😂 and he’s rather childish in terms of not having much independence and after his last relationship he was controlled a lot so I try to avoid appearing controlling like his ex
 
Nov 6
19:24
Communication is what relationships are based on. If you cannot communicate you cannot have a happy, healthy relationship. This is his issue to work on, there’s not really anything you can do. He sounds very immature tbh. I’m not really sure why you would be in a relationship with someone who is immature and childish and constantly yells at you when you’re just trying to work on your relationship...
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Nov 6
19:25
I guess it’s because it’s my first proper relationship, he took my virginity and we used to communicate so well but since he’s turned 18, he’s gone straight into full time work and nights out with the lads and it doesn’t feel the same. I miss the old days when I could talk to him about anything and get his advice but now I’m lucky if he even listens..
 
Nov 6
19:28
@kimberleymae Honestly it’s best to either find someone with the same maturity level as you or just be single. I don’t know why you would want to be with a guy like that, it just isn’t ever going to work if he can’t communicate. Sounds like you two just are in very different stages of life right now. Him being your first proper relationship doesn’t mean he’s somehow allowed to treat you wrong and you just have to stick with him, you’re still young and there are plenty of guys out there that are actually capable of having a healthy relationship.
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Nov 6
19:29
That’s a deal breaker for me. I would talk to him about the issue and if he is not willing to make an effort to communicate then I would reconsider the relationship.
1
Nov 6
19:30
I need to talk to him and if he isn’t willing to open up and listen to me then clearly his interest just isn’t there anymore
 
Nov 6
19:35
Never stay with someone who is treating you badly just because they’re your first partner or because you’ve been together for x amount of time or whatever. If you do not have proper communication in a relationship, there’s literally no point in being in the relationship. You deserve better than him.
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